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[ A very nondescript young man, aside from the fact that he's managing to look awkward, desperate and frustrated all in one. He runs a hand anxiously through his hair, and it's clear from the not remotely cool disheveled look of it that it's not for the first time. ]
Hello. Hi? Anyone out there? [ cue a genuinely cringe-inducing English accent ] Can anybody heeaaar me? Is anyone alive out theeere? [ like in Titanic, get it? No? Okay, he regrets that anyway, as is obvious from the slight grimace that follows it. ]
Okay, pretend that didn't happen. But really, is anyone listening? Maybe? ...please?
Hello. Hi? Anyone out there? [ cue a genuinely cringe-inducing English accent ] Can anybody heeaaar me? Is anyone alive out theeere? [ like in Titanic, get it? No? Okay, he regrets that anyway, as is obvious from the slight grimace that follows it. ]
Okay, pretend that didn't happen. But really, is anyone listening? Maybe? ...please?
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Wow, someone's chipper. You could've just stuck with a simple "yes", concise, to the point, not a horrible first impression.
[ What he was going to ask was 'who are you, where are you from', but the attitude is slightly distracting. ]
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You weren't exactly concise yourself. In fact, I'd say that, up there? Was the direct opposite of anything even approaching a point.
But if you're done flailing, I'm Derek.
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Touché. It's a real pleasure, let me tell you. [ Emphasis for sarcasm. Hint, it is not actually a pleasure, you're kind of a butthead. ]
I'm Josh, I'm from Boston, I like martial arts films, I'm clearly very desperate for conversation. So, tell us a little bit about yourself, Derek. [ He might be putting on a bit of a dating ad voice there. Just a bit, though. At least he didn't say 'long walks on the beach'. ]
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I like not engaging in small talk.
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Oh, ah-ha-ha, I see what you did there. You're clever. What about cars, do you like those? That's manly, right. I bet you've fixed a few cars in your time. [ No he's not hitting on him, he just doesn't have a very good filter. ]
It's cold and I think it's going to rain and it smells like dog out here. If you help me out, I'll do you the favor of never speaking to you again.
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Sounds like a great deal. [pausing ...] --what do you mean, wet dog?
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He doesn't have the wherewithal to be suspicious of Derek's suspicion - besides, where he comes from, the only people remotely interested in other werewolves are wolves and vampires, and either way, they know right off the bat. Normal people having any clue isn't an issue - more like intense denial - so he's not really on the lookout for fishy lines of questioning. ]
Yeah, you know, dog. Soon to be wet, assuming it rains. Actually, this place just smells... bad. I'm in the middle of nowhere, but I passed a crappy house about a mile back. There's probably roadkill around here somewhere.
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There's roadkill everywhere.
[this guy's nervous rambling reminds him of Stiles. Not necessarily in a good way.] Come on. Let's go see about that car.
this has magically transformed into action ok BAM
Yes it's crappy, what would you call it? It's missing half of its... well, half of it. Now that Derek's decided to help, Josh can't help but doubt the integrity of this plan - creepy guy all dressed in black in the middle of nowhere, clearly with anti-social tendencies. But hey, not like being near this guy back at his car is any worse than being anywhere else, so... either way, he seems genuinely surprised that Derek's agreed to help, despite his confident badgering previously. ]
Right. Okay. Thank you. It's uh, back - [ He spins around to look behind him, apparently lost for all of two seconds before fixing on a course. ] - this way.
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So what's the problem? Something with the engine? Keys stuck in the transmission?
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I'm no expert, but going by the smoke and dying cat noises I'd have to say eng-OH MY GOD. [ Well okay that's a bit dramatic. He's suddenly a flurry of motion, jerking away from Derek and nearly tripping over backwards in the process, hands flying out of his pockets and to the sides of his head in disbelief. They don't stay there long - in the next second, one is pointing at Derek in accusation, and he sounds a bit like he just saw Derek kick a puppy. ]
You're a wolf!
[ Hello and welcome to Josh's world of werewolf social skills, hope you weren't hoping for subtlety. ]
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What did you just say?
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You, you're a wolf - [ the 'you' accompanied by wild gesturing at Derek's general being ] - you're the dog. Are you kidding me with this? What are you even doing out here? [ YEAH DEREK how dare you be a werewolf out in the middle of the woods, jeez ]
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[wait, wait, back up. Goddammit. What is going on here. He is losing a hold on this situation.]
Why do you think I'm a wolf?!
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Um, hello - [ Now he's pointing at his own nose, as if that should make things crystal clear. ] Werewolf senses? Takes one to know one?
[ He stops abruptly, expression switching to one of thoughtful concern, almost like he's self-conscious. ] Wait, can you not smell me?
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[because that is weird, even for Derek Hale. But, now that he's brought it up, Derek stares at Josh thoughtfully. He's telling the truth--that much is plain, given his heartbeat, which has stayed at a constant rabbit's pace throughout this conversation. But there is something else, too.]
... You're not like us.
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Us? Wait, I haven't stumbled into some kind of weird werewolf commune, have I? [ He's actually looking around a bit at that one, as if he expects to see... a werewolf commune. Otherwise known as a pack, probably - clearly not as big a term where he's from. It doesn't take him long to latch on to the rest of that sentence, though, looking back to Derek with that same concerned expression. ]
And wait, not like you? Not like you how? [ A thought occurs to him, and he takes a short step back, hands raising in a casually defensive gesture. ] Wait, are you a born werewolf? Because, no offense, most of them seem to be kind of douchey.
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Does talking nonsense just come naturally to you, or do you work on it? Seriously.
[oh wow, UNCALLED FOR JAB, too. He sets his teeth.] So what if I am. What does 'kind of douchey' even mean.
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Oh, wow, excuse me for not knowing the werewolf code. Is there a secret handshake we're supposed to do instead? [ To answer your question: yes, talking nonsense does come naturally to him. ]
And 'kind of douchey', meaning a little bit serial killer, really into the running naked through the moonlight thing.
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[he's not ... even sure he still has one, but YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW THAT, stranger. His frown deepens as Josh keeps talking.]
Wow, thanks for that--totally inaccurate, by the way--comparison.
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Okay, so not so much with the killer beast thing, that's good. What is it that you and your "pack" get up to around here, then? [ He sounds less aggressive now, but it's shifted to a probably equally offensive mix of delicate and patronizing. ]
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Right, of course. I mean, what else would you be doing? [ Genuinely trying to sooth him here, even with the usual rambling. He's distracted momentarily by the actual amount of nothingness around him, gaze wandering over the apparently endless trees. ]
... out here, in the middle of nowhere. You said you live here?
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A family of hunters lives in this town. Walking around wherever I want to--especially at night--isn't an option.
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Hunters? What do you mean, hunters? Seasonal deer hunting? Don't want to go all "grr" on them on the full moon, make a mess?
[ Yes, he's completely missing the point. The only kind of hunter he's ever been worried about is the kind that he might accidentally eat. ]